broken and beautiful ;

a confused soul is the only piece of mind
i've ever had.
constantly confused, constantly wondering.
it all bears with me until a certain time.
it's all decent, not fine, and not bad. just alright.
untill that time comes i can keep it under controll.

then it comes.
and when it comes its like a punch in the heart.
a punch in the face, and a voice screaming failure.
then come the tears, that just come and you can't hold them in.
you can try and hide them but they just happen.
then the feeling just lives on for God knows how long.

waiting on love ain't so easy to do .

if you love me,
then let me know;
because i can't wait for you forever.
because forever is a long time,
and who know's how long forever can last
when nothing is forever; besides history.

see you and me have history,
but if you love something so much you can change it.
you can't change the past but you can bring it and make it your future.
because in my forever i want you to be , whatever time forever can be.

forever could be tomorrow, or the next day, or another year.
who knows how much time we have left.
to live our days,
but why would i want to waste this time waiting for forever.
when im wasting time i could be spent with you.

this is anger as beauty.

No sense in understanding when it all changes.
I've drifted away from the shore,
and stranded myself in the middle of lake.
The lake that's full of different traits of emotions.
Splashing me and making me feel a thousand things at once.
Over and over just taking me.

I can look around and see the sun shining ,
through the snow white clouds, the red maple tree's.
and the greenest of green grass known to myself.
but how can I feel so down when the suns shining so brightly?
It's not raining... does that make any sense ?
Cause it doesn't to me.

This is anger as beauty.
Some of which I don't understand.
but what do I ?